Societal expectations

But make it meaningful

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Learning to deal with societal expectations is a pivotal part of our self-love journey.

Often, it isn’t until we start healing that we become aware of society’s influence on our happiness and self-worth.

So today, I’m doing a fun experiment: I will list a few societal expectations I’m familiar with and evaluate whether I “succeeded” or not. Then, I will share with you what I think these expectations intend to ask us.

Credit: @titsayy

#1. Go to school + get good grades

Yes, I did this! Growing up, I loved the thrill of mastering something new. Of course, I loved some subjects more than others, but still, I’m pretty disciplined. Plus, I liked making my parents proud.

But what if, instead of good grades, we ask ourselves this:

“Am I stimulated and curious?” 

School is a time for kids to learn about the world. Wouldn’t it be nice if we focused our energy on stimulation and curiosity, rather than results?

#2. Get a good job + progress in your career

After graduating, I landed a job I’ve always wanted, but I quickly evolved past it. I’m still figuring things out, but I believe I’m doing well as I’m still experimenting, learning, and adapting.

But what if, instead of a career, we ask ourselves this:

“Am I fulfilled by what I do?” 

For some, a job is just a job. For others, a job is their soul work. So, whatever you do, consider if your job fulfills the lifestyle you’re achieving or your legacy.

#3. Be financially independent (aka have money)

Money tends to bring up a lot of wounds in people—you too?

I’ve had the privilege of growing up with parents who worked hard to provide me with the education and lifestyle I have. I’m in my 20s and living at home, but I know I’ll be earning lots one day and return the love to my family!

But what if, instead of blindly accumulating money, we ask ourselves this:

“Why do I want money? How do I ultimately want to feel from having money?”

Is it stability? Security? Freedom? Understanding what money means to you will help you repair or strengthen your money stories, and ultimately make choices that are true to you.

#4. Get a partner + get married

Here’s what I’ve learned after getting out of a 5-year relationship: the most incredible partnership you will ever have is between you and you.

So what if, instead of marriage, we ask ourselves this:

“Do I feel supported?”

A relationship is only expansive when it supports you. Sometimes, we’re not ready for a relationship because we’re still learning to support ourselves.

So take the focus off of finding someone, and find yourself! When you do, the Universe will bring you someone awesome to play with.

Let Go or Embrace Them

Expectations are heavy because we, on some level, choose to carry them. And that’s okay.

The whole point of being human is to sift through life and identify what you don’t want—so you know what you do want.

This is also how you find out who you want to be and how you want to think about things.

I hope this post inspires you to challenge the blueprint you’re currently holding. Maybe it’s time to let go of some outdated expectations, or maybe, it’s time to make them your own.

💬 How did you find today’s post? What are some expectations you’ve dealt with growing up, and how did you find your way through them?