Releasing Triggers
Defensiveness is your body’s way of rejecting what isn’t true to you
Emotional Dumpling is a free newsletter by Suki Chan. If you liked reading today’s story, you can share an excerpt of it with a friend or on social media. Your support means the world to me. Happy reading!
A week ago, I was lying in bed, letting my mind run at the speed of light. Suddenly, something came to me. I wrote it down in my notes.
Let that sink in.
Defensiveness is your body’s way of rejecting what isn’t true to you.
Over the past few years, I’ve been shifting further and further from the norm. Every time I level up, I feel an initial resistance to change. My fear of being judged or misunderstood is often waiting on the other side.
Releasing your triggers is about forgiving yourself.
It is about forgiving that false part of you who believes that other people (or your past) know you better than you do now.
Healing teaches us that no one’s understanding can complete us. At its best, it soothes you. At its worst, it cages you. After all, who can truly understand you other than yourself?
As a teenager, I've always liked being honest with my mom.
Whenever I make plans with friends, I always get my mom’s agreement first. Once, a friend asked me why I bothered getting my mom to agree with me when she had already said “yes”. I told him it's because I like it when I’m transparent with my mom.
I see the pattern behind my behaviours now: I just wanted my mom’s understanding.
Healing teaches us that no one’s understanding can complete us. At its best, it soothes you. At its worst, it cages you. After all, who can truly understand you other than yourself?
Our body is psychic and communicates with us daily.
If we can trust our stomach to tell us when we’re hungry or full and when we’re making an aligned or not-so-aligned decision—why can’t we trust our body when it feels defensive?
The next time you feel defensive, try this with me:
Notice when you feel triggered
Instead of reacting with your words or mind, listen to the pain in your body
Ask yourself, “what am I falsely concluding about myself from this trigger?” Since your body and soul know that is not true...
Ask yourself again: “what is my truth?”
I am selfish. No, I am kind and have a beautiful heart.I do not deserve an easy life. No, I am worthy.I am not enough. No, I am enough.
Yes.
You are enough.
Thank you for sharing your wisdom with us. I love the steps to move through defensiveness. Needed that this past weekend 😂 God’s timing not ours xoxo
"I was lying in bed, letting my mind run at the speed of light. Suddenly, something came to me. I wrote it down in my notes."
I'm glad I'm not the only one who does this. 80% of the time it's mostly just about food, but on occasion I encounter something worthwhile...