Emotional Dumpling is a free newsletter by Suki Chan. If you liked reading today’s story, you can share an excerpt of it with a friend or on social media. Your support means the world to me. Happy reading!
Once upon a time, our cave-dwelling ancestors lived entirely in the present moment. Yes, that’s right, those who came before us mastered the art of mindfulness—that is until ‘consciousness’ came into the picture.
Before you read on, I must warn you: this week we’re geeking out on all things human psychology and evolution 🤓. So if you’re interested in this topic but you’re busy right now, *save this post* so you can read it later.
Today, I want to share a fascinating concept I learned in university that helped me understand people better and start many memorable conversations.
It begins with two words: self-impermanence anxiety.
What is self-impermanence anxiety?
Self-impermanence anxiety, in simple terms, is the troubling awareness we have of our mortality. It is said that this anxiety came about when consciousness evolved amongst our ancestors.
Consciousness is a state of being aware of and responsive to our environment, both externally and internally. When our ancestors gained consciousness, they started to understand time; they developed an ability to reflect on their past and plan for the future.
The only downfall? They also realized there is such a thing as death!
Self-impermanence anxiety, then, is an existential crisis. But our ancestors were smart. They learned to escape these worries by relying on specific distractions and impulses.
Today, these impulses are known as the four fundamental human drives (a repackage of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs).
Four fundamental human drives
We have four innate impulses: sex, survival, leisure, and legacy.
Sex Drive - what helps us reproduce and pass on genes
Survival Drive - what helps us stay alive and healthy so we can reproduce and take care of our young
Here’s when it gets super interesting: our impulses for leisure and legacy.
Some say these two drives are uniquely human motivations because they helped our ancestors buffer their anxiety, and achieve higher well-being and survival:
Leisure Drive - our desire for pleasurable activities and rewards, which helps us escape from our worries. This is when we indulge in food/sex, seek romance, learn new things, and use our imagination.
Legacy Drive - our desire to achieve something great, or be a part of something bigger, to give ourselves a sense of meaning, purpose, and “immortality”. This is when we try to shape young minds, strive for fame/status, accumulate wealth, and form groups or religions.
If we take a step back and look at the history of human culture, how many monuments and inventions came from our desire for leisure and legacy?
And how many of our everyday behaviours still reflect these motivations?
Bridging understanding between generations
Back in my parents' days, leisure was as simple as them buying movie tickets and watching them at a local theatre. Their sense of legacy came from getting educated and being able to start a family.
A few years ago, I was grabbing coffee with a creative director at my old agency. She is maybe ten years older than me, and we talked about how young people nowadays seek purpose and passion in their jobs.
She asked me, “why? Back then, I just got any job I could get.”
I then said, “people want passion more than anything because we all want to experience pleasure and achieve something meaningful.
Back in my parents' days, leisure was as simple as them buying movie tickets and watching them at a local theatre. Their sense of legacy came from getting educated and being able to start a family.
People of older generations then paved the way for younger folks to have stability. Now, it's normal (for most) to have a university degree and access movies and all kinds of things with a single click.
So, where does that leave us?
How can we find our pleasure and personal legacy? It only makes sense that we want to experience something bigger and greater—now more than ever.”
Concluding thoughts
“For a man to be able to live he must either not see the infinite, or have such an explanation of the meaning of life as will connect the finite with the infinite.”
– Leo Tolstoy
We all search for distraction and meaning in our lives through simple pleasures and worthy achievements.
This is why it never bothers me why people want what they want, even if it’s different from what I want.
We are all doing the best we can with the time we have.
Summary of key terms
Self-impermanence anxiety: the anxiety human beings have over their impermanence or mortality
Consciousness: a state of being aware of and responsive to one's environment
The four human drives: our innate motivations or impulses
Leisure drive: our desire for pleasurable activities and rewards; said to be uniquely human and helps distract us from our anxiety
Legacy drive: our desire for achievements and accomplishments; said to be uniquely human and helps us find meaning and purpose
Great thought provoking article!
I think the key is finding the ability to balance the more ancient part of the brain with the newer part of the brain allows us to access our intuition and instinct while able to learn and problem solve based on our current environment.